Thursday, April 22, 2010

Tomorrow I will stop procrastinating

This past October marked my 30th birthday. I decided then that I was going to make some changes. I was going to eat healthier, lose weight, have a cleaner house, be more motivated to be the best me that I could be. Now, 6 months later, I am just getting started.

My husband is the very picture of will power. When he sets his mind to something that is it, he does it and nothing can steer him away until his goal is complete. I, on the other hand, am a day dreamer, I spend so much time pondering how to do something that it never gets done. I get easily distracted and i completely over think and over worry everything.

About a month ago we started dieting.No fancy plans or gimmicks just counting calories and trying to eat healthy food. My husband has lost 20 lbs and I have lost 10. I am not obese, I am actually just over the line between being healthy and being overweight. I would like to get between 120 and 130 lbs. I know when I eat right and I exercise I feel better not only physically but emotionally. I am less tired and less depressed. However, this is where I get stuck. I always get stuck at those 10 lbs and then for some inexplicable reason I give up...

This week I have been so unmotivated, I worked out once, I have been eating healthy but not counting. My house is a total disaster and there is no excuse for it. Dishes in the sink, laundry piling up. I am determined to get my house in order and to move past these 10 lbs, to break a lifetime of bad habits and a battle with food that extends beyond when I can remember. I always under eat or over eat and for me at this point I know that I need to conquer whatever it is in my head that is holding me back from truly having a healthy body and mind. I cheated a bit this week, had some candy but instead of doing what i normally do and determining that I am destined to stay chubby I am moving past it. I am choosing to tell myself that it is ok to slip up every now and then, the point is to get back up and keep going. I need to know that I can do this and I am worth doing this.

1 comment:

  1. You CAN do this and YOU DO deserve this and YOU ARE worth it.

    I understand all to well where you are coming from. I struggle the same way.

    Believe in yourself and anything is possible.