Holiday Picture Memories

As I bandage the minor abrasions on my hands caused by animals trying to escape the torture of being dressed up and posed for a holiday photo, i wonder, was it worth it? YES! It totally was! The pictures are heartwarming, funny and a memory to last a lifetime.

Have you ever tried taking pictures of your kids? They squirm and fuss and ask if you are done yet and you say I would be done faster if you would just smile! Well take that scenario and add in 3 dogs, a rabbit and a box turtle. The dogs were actually all too happy to don their Christmas garb. They jumped and wagged tails and panted excitedly then pranced around the room to show them off. The Rabbit was not too happy, only because I attached a bow to his harness and he hates the harness (rabbits were not meant to be walked) but once it was on he hopped around happily without a care. The box turtle (tortoise my son would say) was none too happy about getting a ribbon tied around her shell and tried the entire time to remove it.

Once everyone is dressed and looking cute I plop them down in front of the tree. Every photo someone is making a face or looking away, it is practically impossible to get all kids and animals facing forward and looking happy. The pets kept wandering away, the children were making faces, but instead of getting annoyed I laughed. It was a wonderful family moment.

I took a few but this was my favorite of the bunch:

One dog is standing tall, the next has given up trying, my daughter is being silly making a face that makes me giggle every time I see it, the rabbit was caught trying to make a getaway, the last dog has become very suspicious of the turtle who just wants that dang bow off and my Son is trying his best to pose while being distracted by his sister. it isn't a perfect picture by any stretch of the imagination but it tells a story and makes me laugh and those are the best photos in my opinion.

It is funny the things we will do to commemorate the holidays. No matter what the trouble or hassle we stick to our traditions and are happy we did. I love looking back at family photos and seeing all my children grow, the ones with fur and the ones without. I am a picture fanatic any day of the week but the holidays are especially important to me and I wouldn't trade those pictures, or the memories of taking them, for anything in the world.

Yes, Eloise, there is a Santa Claus

I have always thought it interesting that many family movies about Christmas depict adults as not believing in Santa Claus causing the little ones watching to worry if Santa is real until somewhere near the end when he reveals himself and the magic of Christmas wins out. So I was surprised to see a different type of grown-up while watching the DVD of Me Eloise: Little miss Christmas with my daughter.

**Spoiler Alert, if you don't want the movie ruined, stop reading (although I am certain the majority of people who would truly care are too young to read anyway)**

For those who don't know, Eloise is the 6 year old protagonist of many books written by Kay Thompson (later adapted to animated movies and the television show Me Eloise) who gets into a lot of mischief but always with the best of intentions. She is rumored to have been loosely modeled after Kay's god-daughter Liza Minelli, but no one knows for sure.

In this Christmas special (from the tv series, not to be confused with Eloise at Christmastime) Eloise wants to put on a special Christmas Eve show with her friends in the plaza Hotel where she lives. She writes a letter and her only wish for this Christmas is that Santa will come and be a part of her show. When her nanny finds out that Santa is Eloise's surprise guest she tells Eloise that she can't expect Santa to come be in her show on Christmas Eve when he is so busy delivering toys to all the children in the world.

This response seemed typical of what you would see from adults in most Christmas specials. It appears she is trying to steer the child away from certain heart break when Santa, who in her mind doesn't really exist, doesn't show up. My first impression is wrong as this is where things take a turn. Later we see nanny talking to Bill, a room service waiter in the hotel who is prone to performing in the hotel restaurant and is helping Eloise with her show.

The conversation goes something like this:
Nanny: I need to talk to you about the children's show
Bill: It is going great
Nanny: I am worried because Eloise and the other Children have their heart set on Santa being there
Bill: But Santa is very busy, it is Christmas Eve
Nanny: I tried to tell her but her heart is set on it, I thought maybe you could help
Bill: I can't be Santa
Nanny: Of course not, but you could pretend to be Santa

This is not verbatim of course but you get the general idea. What impressed me was here you see two adults, talking alone about how busy Santa is and how bill is going to dress up and pretend to be Santa because surely the real Santa will be too busy to come himself.

I loved seeing two adults who clearly believe Santa exists. I felt this captured a childlike imagination. It took the magic of Christmas and said this is something grown-ups can believe in too. I liked that my daughter was seeing this exchange and I liked watching her become worried, not that Santa may not be real, but that he would be too busy. You see little elements of this throughout the film, one of my favorite moments is when the Hotel inspector (throughout the movie the Hotel owner was sweating his arrival and actually makes the kids cancel their show at one point for fear of upsetting the inspector) gets so excited about the Holiday show and Christmas cookies and asks Santa if their is a present for him.

I am a fan of Santa and childhood imagination. I let my kids believe whatever they want to believe and embrace the world of magic and imagination. I don't condemn parents who don't, or who choose to teach their kids otherwise but personally I was pleased to see a movie that fully embraced that the magic of Christmas can be for the grownups too.

I have a blog?

Wow! It has been a while!

My journey to getting healthy has gone well. I am at 130, and while not my initial goal weight I am comfortable with it. I am in a size 8 and like not only how good I look but how good I feel.

I have so much more energy to be the mom I want to be. I love taking walks with the kids and playing outside with them so much more than I used to. Also, my being active and trying to eat healthy is having an impact on them. i see my 6 year old son making healthier choices at snack time without any prompting from me and that feels good.

For me it was about shifting my focus from weight loss to getting healthy. This meant a change for not only me but for my whole family. We still have treats from time to time and i am not super health queen by any means, but we do our best and try to have fun while we are at it.

Feeling Good

At last weigh-in I was 133, that is a total of 22 lbs lost and I am feeling pretty good. my biggest hurdle is looking in the mirror and not seeing a difference. I know there is a difference because friends comment all the time and my husband can see the difference. Not to mention the fact that my clothes are baggy.

I have always had this warped sense of self-image. When i weighed 110 and was a size 2/4 I saw myself as fat. This time around is different though. Even though my eyes still see a chubby girl it doesn't seem to matter. I am happy, I feel good,I have more energy and I even feel a bit sexy. I think this is because it isn't enough to want to lose weight or be thin, you have to know why it is that you have issues with food. if you don't address the cause you are only treating symptoms and those problems will resurface.

My goal is to make a total lifestyle change and I think I am doing that. We have made small changes that aer adding up to big success. I eat a lot of whole grains, fruits and veggies. I measure things out to make sure i am getting the proper protions. I don't deprive myself. We will have a treat or two on the weekends. Eating healthy doesn't mean you can never indulge or that you have to sacrifice on taste. We have had some truly delicious meals that were low in fat and calories and packed with nutrition. I have also made being active part of my life, not just exercise but just getting up and enjoying life, taking a walk playing with the kids and dogs in the yard, anything to get moving and enjoy life. I can see the difference in my attitude, I feel better on the inside as well as the outside. I am more positive and less depressed.

I am hoping to continue to lose weight to my goal of 115 and more than that to have instilled in myself and my family some healthy habits that will last a lifetime.

Revealing the true self

My husband and I are currently redoing the floors in our home. We have taken up all the carpet to reveal the gorgeous hardwood underneath. Then we had to sand, polish, stain and finish them. It is taking some time but in the end they are looking absolutely beautiful.

This project comes on the cusp of us changing our eating habits and vowing to be healthier. I think the two go hand in hand. When you begin taking care of one aspect of your life you want the rest of your life to follow. Redoing the floor really makes me want to be more organized and a better housekeeper. I want my house to be beautiful, my body to be beautiful, my life to be beautiful.

It is so hard to get all the pieces into place especially when you have let your entire life be full of disorder. I am changing my whole outlook on life and really trying to push myself. My husband said "it is amazing how hard it is to win when you are fighting yourself." This is so true, outside pressures are nothing compared with the inner dialogue that keeps us from moving forward in life.

I think this process of change is like our floors. You remove the mask that is hiding the beauty but then you have to begin to repair the damage years of hiding has done. I am ready to let my true colors shine and step forward and embrace who I am and who I want to become.

Tomorrow I will stop procrastinating

This past October marked my 30th birthday. I decided then that I was going to make some changes. I was going to eat healthier, lose weight, have a cleaner house, be more motivated to be the best me that I could be. Now, 6 months later, I am just getting started.

My husband is the very picture of will power. When he sets his mind to something that is it, he does it and nothing can steer him away until his goal is complete. I, on the other hand, am a day dreamer, I spend so much time pondering how to do something that it never gets done. I get easily distracted and i completely over think and over worry everything.

About a month ago we started dieting.No fancy plans or gimmicks just counting calories and trying to eat healthy food. My husband has lost 20 lbs and I have lost 10. I am not obese, I am actually just over the line between being healthy and being overweight. I would like to get between 120 and 130 lbs. I know when I eat right and I exercise I feel better not only physically but emotionally. I am less tired and less depressed. However, this is where I get stuck. I always get stuck at those 10 lbs and then for some inexplicable reason I give up...

This week I have been so unmotivated, I worked out once, I have been eating healthy but not counting. My house is a total disaster and there is no excuse for it. Dishes in the sink, laundry piling up. I am determined to get my house in order and to move past these 10 lbs, to break a lifetime of bad habits and a battle with food that extends beyond when I can remember. I always under eat or over eat and for me at this point I know that I need to conquer whatever it is in my head that is holding me back from truly having a healthy body and mind. I cheated a bit this week, had some candy but instead of doing what i normally do and determining that I am destined to stay chubby I am moving past it. I am choosing to tell myself that it is ok to slip up every now and then, the point is to get back up and keep going. I need to know that I can do this and I am worth doing this.